Category Archives: Baltimore

From the Bal’more desk

Couple excellent Crime Scene items recently:

Robbery: Hartwait Street, 6500 block, January 26, 10am
Someone broke the window of a truck and took $5,000 worth of donuts and Tasty-Kakes.

This begs a few questions: how many donuts constitute $5,000, and is there some sort of black market for Tasty Kakes?

And a slower week this week:

Robbery: Brown Avenue, 6300 block, January 27, 6:16pm:
A woman
got into an argument with a man who would not give her money for
Pampers.  He struck her buttocks and took her cell phone.  His friend
gave the cell phone back and both men fled.

Burglary: S. Conkling Street, 800 block, February 3, 10:00am:
Someone kicked in the front door of a house and punched a hole in the bathroom sink.  Nothing was taken.

Larceny from Auto: S. Chester Street, 400 block, February 2, 11:25am:
Someone broke into a car and took two 12-packs of Mountain Dew and Dr.
Pepper, a bag of Doritos, and a bag filled with miscellaneous property
including a Jerry Springer CD, Life Savers and a bottle of Advil as
well as a box of cat box liners and two cat collars, one blue and one
pink.  The bag and all its contents were found a short time later;
apparently the suspect forgot it as he fled.  The Doritos and soda,
however, were not recovered.

Speaking of Baltimore, I’ve suddenly gotten really into The Wire.  I’ve always watched it, but this season has really grabbed me.  The whole serial killer storyline?  Oh, no, he di’nt!  So I offer a few Wire links for those inclined:

What real thugs think of The Wire, featuring such tidbits as ““When you see a cop losing his head like that — drinking, acting crazy
— you go after it. That’s like m—er f—ing Christmas in the ‘hood!” in reference to McNulty, and “Meanwhile, none of them showed any interest in the affairs of the Baltimore Sun.”

Speaking of my TV boyfriend ex-husband McNulty, here he is at his finest, from season two.  And some good, old-fashioned (NSFW) crime solving from season 1.  Excellent.

More Crime Scene news

While I’m still organizing my photos and thoughts from my almost back-to-back trips to Nicaragua and Paris, here’s another installment of Crime Scene notes from Baltimore:

Aggravated Assault:
Brown Avenue, 6300 block, January 10, 4am:
A man and woman were having an argument.  The man struck the woman withan alarm clock and then fled the area.  Police were called and the manwas arrested later, and was found to smell strongly of alcohol.

Bank Street, 6900 block, January 11, 8:22pm:
An intoxicated man threw soda on the floor of his house and began threatening family members with a shotgun.  He kept repeating the words “Lock and load” as he did so.  Police arrested him and confiscated the shotgun as well as a number of other firearms and ammunition.

Larceny from Auto:
E. Pratt Street, 2100 block, January 10, 10:05am:
Someone opened the door of a car and took a down jacket, two pairs of baby shoes, a cutting board, four bags of snacks and a box of fondue.


I couldn’t make this up if I tried

I've been knee-deep in the gossip rags, trying to spread the word about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' visit to Italy this weekend, crafting email subject lines like "Spotted: TomKat does the Dolomites."  I work with Hotel Rosa Alpina in the Italian Alps, who hosted them for lunch at their mountain chalet.  You can read all the details (which I provided) on HotelChatter.com, but I didn't release any photos.  So I was amazed to find so many photos all over the internet, where did they come from?!  I was even more astonished to pick up US Weekly today and find a two-page spread on it!  How do you do it, Us Weekly?!  They were just there on Saturday!  I guess Italy did invent paparazzi, but I'm impressed and almost feel kind of bad for the Cruises (keyword: almost).

On a completely different note, my dear friend Eleanor in Baltimore has been supplying me with a different kind of gossip: "Crime Scene" notes from the local police blotter in the paper.  This is all absolutely true, and you'd believe it without question if you knew much about Baltimore:

Her original email included:

Robbery:
Brentwood Avenue, 6700 block, October 3, 8:45pm
A man
was arrested after he robbed a convenience store of $150.  He
approached an employee and said, "You told Jim I'm in here every night
and that all I do is walk around and steal."  He ordered her to give up
the money in the register.  She yelled, "Get it yourself" and went to
the back room, locking the door behind herself.  The suspect was found a
short time later, inside a local bar with his girlfriend.

Burglary:
Pulaski Highway, 3000 block, October 8, 9am
An
80-year-old woman answered her door and found two female suspects
standing there, dressed in pink pajamas.  They told her they were
conducting pest inspections in the area and needed to search the house
for rats
.  The woman let them in.  They stayed briefly, then left.  The
woman soon noticed that her house keys were missing

Larceny from Auto:
S. Regester Street, 400 block, October 7, 7:40pm
Someone broke the window of a car and took 40 cents in change.

Then there was a lapse in her emails, as the (free) paper kept getting stolen from her doorstep.

Today's sampling:

S. Curley Street, 100 block, December 2, 11 a.m.  Someone broke the
window of a car and took a Neil Diamond CD and a bingo marker.

S. Front Street, unit block, November 26, 2:15 a.m
.  Someone broke the window of a car and stole clothing and a box of sex toys, value unknown.


She wonders if it was the same person, as the sex toys might necessitate a little Neil Diamond.

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